Dreaming of

Booze Hound. Fashion Whore. Damn Right. Sin is in, sweetie.

Friday, November 11, 2005

GOOD LUCK to all those who still have exams left - we're at the last stretch!
And CONGRATS to all the bitches who have already finished!
We should all be extremely proud of ourselves and thankful for our newfound freedom and lives.
I have been thinking about it seriously for quite a while now and I would like to announce that as of Monday 14th November, I am dumping my boyfriend - VCE.
That is all.

And the family keeps on growing...

Recently I opened my email to discover that to my suprise I was the owner of a child.


"Hi Cate, I'm just sending you a quick email as ****** at ***** has said that you would be willing to be interviewed about your son's condition. I wondered if you could give me a call as soon as possible just for an informal chat with a view to setting up a telephone interview. Best wishes, *******" (This email came from England)


So being the nice person I am, I replied.


"Hey Homey, I think you may have the wrong address because I'm 18, I live in Australia and last time I checked, I didn't have any kids. But thank you for your concern. Cate"


After sending this out to all my friends in the hope that they'd support me through this tough time, I found this:


"This email and any attachments are confidential and may be legally privileged or protected by copyright. If you are not the intended recipient of this email you must not act on it, copy it or show it to anyone. If you have received this in error, please notify the sender immediately and then delete this email."


Whoops.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Miss Hilton you must be worth...less

Paris Hilton is fine boys and girls! Please cancel your plane tickets and unpack your bags...
Paris Hilton was involved in a minor accident today when boyfriend Starvos Niarchos drove her silver Bently into the back of a truck. Ironically they were trying to get away from the paparazzi - way to attract no attention guys! The pair (along with two other rich bitches in the back seat - look it up yourself if you care) tried to remain as inconspicuous as possible (despite having tens of people with cameras flashing at them and one video camera http://tmz.aol.com/) and attempted to drive away before being pulled over by the cops a block down the road.

In other Paris related news (what isn't these days? Paris probably started the whole bloody bird flu thing) Christian Slater recently attended one of her formal soiree's and as he was spying on her neighbours (as you do...) he fell out the window, past the first floor and landed in a bush. Slater is now up for groping charges as this incident broke his six-week good behaviour bond.

A cop breaking the law? Never!

Constable Kelly O'Rourke aka Samantha Tolj was last night charged with drink driving after catching the attention of the police when she drove her car through a fence and side-swiped a tree. Tolj who is a member of RADD (Recording Artists, Actors and Athletes Against Drink Driving - http://www.radd.net.au/personalities/actors.asp) was breathalised at 1.8 - four times over the legal limit. She has lost her license for a year. What's surprising though is that it was channel 7 who first broke the news - maybe they don't think they love her anymore?

Bird flu hits Disneyland



Sorry children

In Memory




I am sad to announce that Big Bird has passed away. The Neighbourhood Watch committee of Sesame Street decided last week that our beloved friend could no longer go on living in this day and age when the world is not as friendly as it used to be. Yes girls and boys, Big Bird's head (pictured above) was chopped off yesterday to prevent the spread of bird flu.



Sexy Beast

A friend recently enquired "Who is this hasselman person? I don't get what all the fuss is about" Well my dear troubled friend, here is a life lesson for you:






David Hasselhoff is a ledgend. Not through any fault of his own he simply fell into the hearts (and some laps) of the women of this world. His fame for no obvious reason has created a form of cult following and mass hysteria. So please, feel free to jump on the bandwagon and like the rest of us sane ones and enjoy the ride.